Precisely Despised

Multiply.
Recognise.
Pain hides.
Scars dry.
Unheard cry.
Numbing high.

You’re surely gonna find.
Not behind the dark side.
Deeper into the dispersed lines.
Where we all refuse & deny.
A pain to end or else panic mortifies.
All of the necessary senses to get high.
Numbed across a pressure; witnessed at hell’s heights.
Isolated Divides.
A demonic stimuli.
Ritualistic deluded guidelines.
Apparently found dead inside.
Despised visions, blurry sight.

Messed up chaos.
All battles lost.
Broken to deform.
All hopes certainly  gone.
Pick up the receiver, pick up the call
Not bitter but surely fine with nailing shots.
Failure & surely a pathetic lost cause.

A certain stage.
A mind cage.
An uncontrolled rage.
Closer to, feel the pain.
Let it out in filthy ways.
Chosen to stay.
Disgusted hate.
Digging a grave.
Changing phase.
Anger range.
Destructive flames.
Fitting frame.
Blindfolded under dark shade.

I don’t care about myself.
I don’t care about my hair.
I don’t care about my skin.
I don’t care about fucking anything.
Godamn it don’t you begin.
Pick me up to deal with everything.

Psyched in not being liked.
Anticipated to push away, from time to time.
Choosing terms to silently die.
All occupied.
Patterns justified.
Dumb fucking mind.
Mirrors. Lies.
Deeper across you may find.
Alienation to get left behind.
A state of control denied.
More than a mechanism, a screaming voice derived.
Precisely despised.
You are making me horrified.
Beat me up & testing my will to utilise and survive.
Corrupting inner conscience to fight.

Obstructing reality.
Blurry calligraphy.
Parallelly nasty.
Lost tragedy.
Fucked up naturally.
And ill mentally.
Will relapse gradually.
Or will suicide quickly.
As a result of feeling guilty.

Daddy dominates.
Mommy fixates.
On a total chaotic waste.
Desperate to operate.
Finding measures to an aid.
Just pretend you’re all fine, pretty much okay.
You know…., you’re own pain.
Destruction rage.
Closer to you’re own ways.
Depression cage.
Filthy shame.
Alcoholic days.
Abused again & again.
Hated myself with more details.
They say times will change.
But how can you say? Really how can you say.
When you’ve beared nothing, just saw a smiling face.
Took pleasures in betraying faith.
Closing eyes towards a world of pain.
Like a puppet, where I was being played.
Not even a field of my game.
Still I took the weight.
Learned from all of the mistakes.
Loved you purely without hate.
But you’re a monster who cannot obey.
Never will have. Never, till date.

Written By :- P.S. (PATIENT Stan)

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