Relapse Fraud (2nd part of Relapse Deed)

3 months clean, now I’m losing it all.

 

Don’t lose it all. 

Whatever you did for a cause.

Remember the slips & falls. 

Till now you were strong. 

But it’s all gone. 

Slowly getting deformed. 

Hands once again perform. 

The filthy deed that calls. 

Time to stop the job. 

Relapsing fraud. 

 

Yet again. 

3AM phase. 

Darkness remains. 

Fighting again, shame. 

Withering migraine. 

Poisoning brain. 

Mind that contains. 

Counting the days. 

Everything becomes waste. 

Can’t face. 

Damaged permanently; too late. 

Recovery breaking game. 

Bitter eroding taste.

Pathetic fail.

Craved for blades. 

Relapsing gate. 

 

Can’t decide. 

What is wrong, what is right? 

All I can do is fight. 

But the craves provide. 

A sense to lose the night. 

Nothing seems purified. 

Thoughts defile. 

Suicidal fright. 

Shaky hands can’t recognise. 

Deep into the skin, bite. 

All of a sudden everythings behind. 

Dripping blood describes. 

Relapsing with time.

Again turned blind. 

Just to feel alive. 

 

One cut’s sensation is high. 

Going for yet another ride. 

Depressive guide. 

Ending the pride. 

Just to stay alive. 

Killing the light. 

Which once shined. 

Relapsing becomes a bribe. 

Bleeding vile.

Another game to hide. 

Anxiety relieved by surprise. 

But it pulled the trigger to disguise.

Just to stay alive. 

 

Don’t lose it all. 

Whatever you did for a cause.

Remember the slips & falls. 

Till now you were strong. 

But it’s all gone. 

Slowly getting deformed. 

Hands once again perform. 

The filthy deed that calls. 

Time to stop the job. 

Relapsing fraud. 

 

Written by P.S  

 

 

 

 

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