Relapse Fraud (2nd part of Relapse Deed)

3 months clean, now I’m losing it all.

 

Don’t lose it all. 

Whatever you did for a cause.

Remember the slips & falls. 

Till now you were strong. 

But it’s all gone. 

Slowly getting deformed. 

Hands once again perform. 

The filthy deed that calls. 

Time to stop the job. 

Relapsing fraud. 

 

Yet again. 

3AM phase. 

Darkness remains. 

Fighting again, shame. 

Withering migraine. 

Poisoning brain. 

Mind that contains. 

Counting the days. 

Everything becomes waste. 

Can’t face. 

Damaged permanently; too late. 

Recovery breaking game. 

Bitter eroding taste.

Pathetic fail.

Craved for blades. 

Relapsing gate. 

 

Can’t decide. 

What is wrong, what is right? 

All I can do is fight. 

But the craves provide. 

A sense to lose the night. 

Nothing seems purified. 

Thoughts defile. 

Suicidal fright. 

Shaky hands can’t recognise. 

Deep into the skin, bite. 

All of a sudden everythings behind. 

Dripping blood describes. 

Relapsing with time.

Again turned blind. 

Just to feel alive. 

 

One cut’s sensation is high. 

Going for yet another ride. 

Depressive guide. 

Ending the pride. 

Just to stay alive. 

Killing the light. 

Which once shined. 

Relapsing becomes a bribe. 

Bleeding vile.

Another game to hide. 

Anxiety relieved by surprise. 

But it pulled the trigger to disguise.

Just to stay alive. 

 

Don’t lose it all. 

Whatever you did for a cause.

Remember the slips & falls. 

Till now you were strong. 

But it’s all gone. 

Slowly getting deformed. 

Hands once again perform. 

The filthy deed that calls. 

Time to stop the job. 

Relapsing fraud. 

 

Written by P.S  

 

 

 

 

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The World Broke Us(Title by Rocky Toppo)

Hypocrisy is not realising.
Blades & cigarettes for anxities.

1-Suggestively confusing.Actively blaming.Void to nothing.Trying to break & using.Insecurities.

Dependant, burden physically. 

Why relationships are meant to be.

To just Adjust with the society.

Turning psychotic blindly.

Innocence of variety.

Suppressed to prove beauty.

Why can’t I be me???
2-Say it please.

For once I cared in need.

That too is being questioned simply.

Expressions & emotions? Used to be.

Now all dirty and filthy.

Why are you so close to hurt me?

I myself is an enemy, of me. isolation not dependancy.

Cuze I care no more about my very ill body.

A cutting duty.

Fire please.

Self destructive needs.

The world is breaking us apart indeed.

Fuck life, Fuck society.

Leave me alone please.

I don’t want your sympathy.

Neither your words of relief.

It all just piles up more to my own disease.

Which will develop practically.

Shaped by society.

Adressing the the pariahs as greedy.

Seeking attention freak.

Mess with me.

Hate me.

Kick the shit out of me.

Whatever you feel extreme.

Take it out on me. 
3-But I won’t Mind

The self destructive choice.

Gently implied.

Phisophically died.

Looser & shy.

Silently denied.

Whispering voice.

Bleeding lines

Broken by the world, from the inside.
4-Another deep cut.

What the fuck.

You messed up.

Despite being positioned.

Taking precautions.

Still a dominating depression.

Deal the dumb.

Lifeless-Ness begun.

A sensitive one.

Died with black luck.

And choosing to carelessly self destruct.

I D G A F.
5-The world broke us,

With nice people for just.

To sympathise our dust.

We don’t need a new bus.

Arrived with anti – religious Narcs.

All we want is to die fast.

You just made messy. 

lately to cut sharp.

Just accepting the dark.

Dark progression…final death destination. Pressuring depression, Isolation is better than dependancy, broken Empath. Borderlines are Assholes. We surely hate ourselves. Do not depend or defend. Because it’s soon to end, the will to test.

Written by P.S (PATIENT Stan)